


Fascination

by bwayfan25



Category: The Shape of Water (2017)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Love, a little sad but mostly happy, and all that junk, mostly his POV but a little hers too, their time together, very very brief mention of the cat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 18:27:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13440651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bwayfan25/pseuds/bwayfan25
Summary: The world of the humans was confusing and dangerous, but there was something so fascinating about it too. But nothing was more fascinating than her.





	Fascination

He was fascinated by everything in her world, but by nothing more so than her.

He figured had his time in that terrible place not been marred by torture and pain, he probably would have been fascinated by that too.

Humans had always been of interest to him, though these humans, these pale humans, were far more angry and dangerous than those others he had seen or met. The others, the ones near him home, had been deferential. Scared, but only because they believed him to be a god. 

She had been much like that when they first met.

After she had helped him escape from the hellish place, she took him back to the small dwelling he figured must be her own. When his strength had returned enough to explore, he had found several odd but delightful things. 

The first was a collection of soft cloths that he had seen her wear as garments. They were never the same twice, unless he counted her visits to him at the facility in which only the top layer changed. 

The second was the music. It had been one of the first signs she had taught him during their visits at the facility. She brought in her music device and they ate food while the sounds swirled around them. With the flowing melodies and harmonies, and with her by his side, for a moment he almost forgot how bad things were. 

But most of all, he was fascinated by her. 

She was so unlike any other human he had met, and she was all the better for it. 

There was the way they communicated. 

Where the other humans used long sounds that sometimes felt like they didn’t even mean anything, everything she said was precise. It had meaning. 

At first, he had thought she had gestured to him solely because he was in the tank and she did not think he could hear her. But when she returned with her offering of food, she had performed a different gesture. And when she came again there was another. 

It soon became clear she did not or could not communicate with sounds the way the other humans did, but that didn’t bother him in the slightest. He too could not use he sounds they made, only his own. As she taught him more and more of what she called  _ signs _ , he found himself not only to understand one of these humans, but able to communicate with them too. 

And it struck him how lonely he had really been. 

Then there was her expression.

He had seen human emotion before. The humans near his home often called upon him to heal or provide when they were at their wit’s end. He had seen anger, heartache, grief. What they did not say with their sounds, he could tell by their face.

But he had never seen such expressions as hers. 

When she smiled to other humans, it was often small, reserved as the edges of her lips turned up. But he seemed one of the few, if the only, to earn one of her  _ true  _ smiles. When he could see her cute, perfect teeth, and her nose crinkled, and her eyes sparkled. Every time she smiled at him, he could feel every word she did not say. Every ounce of joy and happiness, for him and for him alone. 

When she was sad, he could read that in her face too. 

Her brow would furrow, her eyes glisten with tears. But worst of all, her lip would tremble and silent, salty tears would fall from her eyes. Where the other humans would be overcome with emotions so strong they would release it from within their being through sounds and shrieks, she would not. She would just seem to collapse in on herself, her arms held tight against her chest as she wept quietly. 

He had only seen her do this once in their time together, and he had at that moment vowed when they left this cruel dark place of the humans together, he would never let her feel that again.

But the one thing that fascinated him most of all was her love for him. 

And yes, he did enjoy the physical love they shared with each other. It was pleasurable and further bonded them to one another. 

But what was even more special was the love she showed him outside of that time.

Never once had she treated him with any less care than he was sure she would share with her beloved of her on species.

When she visited him in the tiled room where he slept, she would sit down next to him. Sometimes she would ask him a question or tell him about her day, but mostly she would just sit there, gently rubbing a hand over his. 

When he was strong enough to leave the water, she would feed him eggs and whatever else she had. She’d putter around the kitchen as they cooked, often returning to him to check in on him, to make sure he was okay. 

When he had mistakenly eaten  _ G-I-L-E-S _ ’ cat, she had not scolded or hurt him. She had rushed to find him and make sure he was safe. Then she took care of  _ G-I-L-E-S _ , tending to his wound, before he offered his service to tend the wound as well. 

She showed her love to him, as much as she could, but he knew she worried it would never  been enough. 

There had been a quiet moment when he had the chance to observe her without her knowledge. 

She was curled up on the sofa wearing her robe (a robe he knew best on the floor), with one of her  _ books _ in her hand. It was different, not like the others on her shelves which were already full of ink. This one was blank, the ink yet to be filled. 

Her hands would move slowly through the air subconsciously, forming the words she was trying to get out of her head, and then she would pick up her inkstick and scribble them down in the  _ book _ . 

He didn’t recognize all of them, but he recognized enough.

_ Know. Want. Time. Together. Short. Weak. Every day. Safe. Happy. Gone. Alone.  _

Alone. 

A word he had come to associate with his old life. The life before her. The life he missed but knew he did not want to return to, that would never be the same, would never be enough without her. 

 

Elisa stared at her journal, thinking. 

She had always kept journals. They had helped most during the times she had no one. She could pretend they were a friend she was talking to at dinner, but that she they would understand everything she meant. 

She tapped the blank page with her pen. The words had been bugging her all day, but now that she had the chance to put them on paper, they didn’t want to come out. So, she put down the pen and raised her hands, if only to provide another way for them to come out. Then she picked the pen back up and started writing.

_ I want him to know how I feel, but I can’t bring myself to tell him. What if he doesn’t understand? What if he doesn’t have a concept of love? And if he does, what if he doesn’t feel the same way?  _

_ We’re running out of time together. He gets weaker by the day, and nothing I can do will make him stronger- not until the rain comes and we can take him to the canal. Then we can get him back into the water where he belongs.  _

_ He’ll be safe there. He’ll be happy there.  _

_ But that means he will be gone and I will be alone once more.  _

_I didn’t realize how truly alone I was until I met him, and I never want to feel that way again. But I can’t go with him. He lives in another world. He doesn’t belong here and any reason I could give for keeping him here ultimately is just me being selfish. If I truly love him, I_ ** _have_** _to do what’s right for him and let him go._

_ He needs to go home, and I have to be okay with that. All I can do now is show him my love while he’s here and hope he understands.  _

_ Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, at least I know I’ve done my best.  _

 

At that moment, she heard a soft chirrup.

Not realizing she was crying until she lifted her head to look at him and felt the tears roll down her cheeks, Elisa looked up to see her beloved creature standing above her. 

He was so beautiful, so much greater and deserved so much more than what she could give him. He deserved to be safe, to be happy. And as long as he was with her, could he truly be either?

As they stared into each other’s eyes, she could feel her chest started to heave.

She tore her eyes away from his and looked down at the book in her lap. The saltwater of her tears had already started to smudge the not-quite-dry ink, washing away her thoughts and feelings. 

Just as some of the dark thoughts that had haunted, both since his appearance in her life and since well before him, started flooding back to her, she felt a damp, rubbery finger on her cheek. 

She looked up again, to see him standing even closer. His had was raised as he stroked her cheek. 

He traced a gentle claw down her cheek to her chin. He stroked that too as he leaned over. 

 

Kissing was not something he was at all familiar with before her. Even had he had someone to do it with in his old life, to him it was not a natural way to show love. . 

But it was to her.

He never wanted to be alone, and he certainly did not want her to be. If he could do anything to stop her crying, to ease her pain, it was this. 

He moved his face closer to hers, his gentle hand still on her chin, as he pressed his lips into hers. 

As they kissed, she lifted her hand to his face. 

They remained there for a moment, before she pulled back. 

He looked at her. She was smiling one of her broad smiles, but there were still tears falling from her eyes. 

Was she happy or sad? Was this a good thing? 

Slowly, he raised a hand to touch his chin.

_ Good? _

She gave one of her silent chuckles, tears still falling as she nodded. 

_ Very good _ .

He lit up as he gave a happy chirp. She gave another silent chuckle, and traced the light on one of his arms. 

She was both happy and sad, and until this moment, he did not know that such a thing could happen. That two so different emotions could exist in the same spirit at once. Could this happen with other emotions too? 

She had taught him so much already, but there was so much more for her to teach him. He could spend the rest of his life learning from her, and it still wouldn’t be enough. Nothing ever would be. 

No length of time together, whether it be days or lifetimes, would be enough to stop him from being fascinated by her.


End file.
